Nothing signals the start of a Super League season better than a round of derby games played in a city that doesn’t have a Super League clubs of its own.
Yes, its that time of the year again, its Millennium Magic!
Born from the days when the Challenge Cup went on the road and fans found didn’t mind the trip to Cardiff, Millennium Magic is a pretty good way for Super League to kick its season off with a bang.
So what happened during the off season? What did you miss?
Well South Sydney nicked another Burgess boy from Bradford, the Wakefield Wildcats mentioned they they may need half a million pounds just to make it to this weekend, Salford again announced they would start construction of their new stadium for the 22nd year in a row while St Helens tried to convince fans that traveling to Widnes to watch home games isn’t a kick in the face.
Paul Cook decided he’s not in the right frame of mind to play the game and took up a job writing for a paper in Hull. hey, his first scoop is that he is a flake! Then we had Penrith signing one of the best young players….how the game in Great Britain will recover I’ll never know.
The biggest news was probably that James Roby scrambled home to sign a long term team with St Helens before he had to think about leaving his small northern town. Wigan signed any player in their lineup under the age of 34 to a new five years deal, and after joking that Joel Monaghan would head to Super League after receiving fellatio from a dog, then joking he’d go to Warrington because obviously they don’t have the cap space, both things happened!
Still with me? Good. So lets have a look at this rounds games!
Huddersfield Giants vs Warrington Wolves
Ten million pounds with of talent will hit the Millennium Stadium turf this weekend, and they will be playing the Huddersfield Giants. If we can get through this match without Joel Managhan raping Wolfie the Wire mascot, I’m calling this whole weekend a success. I give the Giants a chance here but its hard to see Warrington being beaten. Then they can all hit the town and drink lots of coke! My Tip: Warrington Accountants by 24
Catalans Dragons vs Harlequins RL
This is the matchup everyone is talking about. I seriously think its about time that the London Super League club is heritage listed. I mean, its like an old ruin…how the hell is it still standing! My Tip: Filthy Cheese Eating Surrender Monkeys by 18
Castleford Tigers vs Wakefield Trinity Wildcats
Listen Castleford, we know the Wildcats are playing in donated jerseys this season, but that doesn’t mean you lot are any better. You play out of a shed and don’t have any money either! The only real winners here are the people that will hopefully get at least 15 pence in the pound when these two teams go into full administration. My Tip: HM Revenue Wildcats by 10
Wigan Warriors vs St Helens
The Super League champions kick off their title defense against their smaller, less well off, less famous, less relevant rivals. With Sam Tomkins a wold wide phenomenon (In Wigan anyway) I just can’t look past the pricks winning this one. My Tip: We Bought A Title Warriors by 14
Salford City Reds vs Wrexham Crusaders
Salford recently become the center of the British sports broadcasting world, and by that I mean, the government subsidized the move of BBC Sport two an area with a low socioeconomic value, therefore forcing all their on air talent to scramble for jobs with Sky Sports. That said, lets just be thankful we have a Welsh Super League clubs still. I mean, they have added a good 1,500 fans to the game! My Tip: Salford City We swear Manchester United Stole Our Logo Reds by 4
Leeds Rhinos vs Bradford Bulls
In between Kevin Sinfield handing out tips to other Super League clubs on how to win (Including Wigan) and Danny McGuire nursing a surgically repaired cheating cunt ligament tear, everyone seems too overlook the fact that Leeds are now coached by a walking, talking disaster. Meanwhile Bradford has finished a clean out they needed since their Auckland Bulls days, and they have a new coach themselves, but and actual decent coach. Still, as always in Super League, follow the money. My Tip: Leeds Cheating Cunt Rhinos by 18
Hull FC vs Hull KR
Drug dealers across Cardiff will be rubbing theirs hands together. The combination of weekend release and a hoard of Hull KR fans hitting the city, meth sales will go through the roof! Thanks to Jordan Tansey deciding he doesn’t need to make money being a Rugby League player and will fall back on his dream of being a drunken bum, Hull FC will be down one player. Then again it could be worse as Hull KR have pushed Willie Masons debut back 7 weeks. And four months. And 8 years. My Tip: Hull Bottle Thowers FC by 8
So there you have it. See how I go picking winners this week before I lose interest because the football is bloody terrible.
